This needs to be linked, it simply does.

Supercat v Kim Jong Il

I don't know why I found it so hilarious, maybe it's the cat screwkicking a Korean dictator or maybe it's the fact that I actually went out yesterday, albeit for only half an hour, to buy Diablo 2 and LoD for the fun of it, but still, there was sunlight! SUNLIGHT! This can't be good for my brain. Really.

In other news

PvP is serious business

Anyway, in case you haven't realised, this is indeed, me being lazy filler.

After that brief (if completely awesome) interlude, back to the holiday.

So I was on holiday in Italy.

Did I mention it was with my relatives?

Yes, that's right folks, my relatives.

Now let me tell you something about every last damn one of them. They're all complete bitches. If I do ANYTHING wrong, anything at all, they'll go and tell every person they know about it behind my back. (Yes I am aware of the irony of me bitching about them here)

This leaves me with two options, take it like a man and act normally or brood about it and glare at them whenever they talk to me, responding with monosyllabic answers that can't be misinterpreted. Now, I'd choose the former, really, except when I got back home I'd have to face my mother whining at me about how I didn't impress them.

Folks, this means that my mother PASSES the door of justice and not for whining at me about playing too much WoW. This is an abomination.

So there I was glaring at my relatives. Just as an aside, other than the bitching, they're nice people, but frankly dealing with family politics for 14 years of my life has made me rather annoyed with them, well that and this holiday was their idea in the first place.

Now I forgot to mention something. I can't drink here either for fear that my parents will kill me. Let me ask you something, what is the point in going on holiday if you can't get drunk out of your bloody mind? Someone? Anyone?

Everyone's seen the Simpson's Halloween special where they make fun of the shining right? "No TV and no beer make Homer go crazy" same sort of thing here.

I'm sitting in a corner about to go at my family with a hacksaw when my cousin comes up to me.

Now let me give you a little picture of my cousin, he's 22, studying law at UCL, really into the army and sports, he did one of those gap year exchange things with the Australians to teach a school sport. (People at Kings will know what I mean) Basically he's the guy I would never be friends with in school. Our conversations are limited to:

Him: Hi
Me: *Glare* Hi
Him: Army going well for you?
Me: *Glare* Haven't been promoted yet
Him: You know I was a staff sergeant in my last year, pity you can't be as good as me.
Me: *Glare* They found my plots for world domination disconcerting.
Him: You know our CCF is the best in the country, we're so hardcore, you know, I breezed through the first 2 years of OTC because I'm that damn good.
Me:*Glare* I completed Time Crisis 2 and 3. (I did as well, there were arcades in the resort, they were the only things that kept me alive)
Him: The shooting on that game isn't anywhere realistic enough
Me: *Glare, add to death list*

This might have vaguely been bearable if there was anything to do. Let me tell you what we did every night. We went shopping. Now I can understand if a guy takes his girlfriend on holiday and they go shopping on holiday every night. He finds it boring as hell, true, but he's in possession of one vital piece of knowledge.

Shopping makes women horny.

He's going to get laid.

Let me tell you the sum total of EVERYTHING I gained from 7 shopping trips. One three headed black dragon statuette (completely awesome yes, but I had it picked out 30 minutes into trip number 1, and my relatives bitched about it and me being too into this fantasy stuff) And the only people getting horny were *shudders* I won't even go into that.

No booze, no games, what was there left for me?

One word, beginning in "g" and ending in "irls".

Mr. Kennedy confirms that myspace is for losers.

LOSER!

I'll update again a bit later today or tommorow. This is just me being lazy filler.

So you're all wondering why the hell I've started a blog. No, I'm not trying to find a place to be emo and whine about how terrible my life is, I'd be using livejournal or myspace for that. No, I'm not trying to start a cult following which will end in world domination, my propaganda department is way ahead on that front. No, this blog has been started out of boredom. Specifically boredom in Italy.

About 10 days ago I was suddenly informed by my parents that I was going on holiday (ye gods, I'm not out of school yet, about 99% of all readers have now gone to read bannable offenses instead, but I'll amuse the rest of you weirdos) . I expressed concern about going on holiday. Read, I tried to stab them with a fork. Whilst I was being restrained they informed me that I'd agreed to it in Easter.

There are a few problems with this. 1. They imply that I would choose to go outside. 2. They imply that I would want to leave my computer for more than a couple of hours. (Yes folks, I do go out, if only to play more video games) 3. They imply that I enjoy wandering around seeing churches, when I'm not Christian, hell, they're not even Christians. Sure the architecture's nice and all but I have a little tool known as the internet. You know what the internet does? Lets me see things that are far away so I don't have to get off my ass. 4. They imply that I want to disrupt the system. Let me run you through the system.

Excuse the fuzziness of the image, I'm lazy as hell.

Note, me, on the left, in my room, with my computer. Note, my parents on the right. Now note the DOOR OF JUSTICE in between the two of us. It's a very simple system. I stay by my computer with said door closed, unless I need to go outside for food or the toilet. My parents conveniently stay on the OTHER side of the door and leave me alone. Occasionally they rant at me for playing too much WoW or not working hard enough. It's a good system, it means I don't have to talk to them. You know what a single hotel room with 3 beds means? NO door of justice. And can you guess what this means? Yes that's right folks, I have to talk with my parents. Why anyone would want to talk to their parents is beyond me. Don't get me wrong, I do love my parents. They're just boring as hell.

They then tell me that they asked while I was playing WoW. Mystery solved. So I found myself packing for Italy. DS, laptop, mobile, I might just live. Then I was told that we were going with my uncle and his family. All games were banned. The fork was unfortunately out of reach.

So I found myself on a plane bound for Italy. The horror of no video games and no computer for a full week.